DIVORCES DON'T HAPPEN SUDDENLY/ Mistakes made by every husband and wife and how to correct them.

Conversation between Husband and wife
Wife (angrily) "I want a divorce"
Husband (annoyed) " shut the HELL UP"
Wife "Conscience does make cowards of us all. See this is your problem,  you just run away from the issues that needs your attention"

Husband " what's the issue?"

Wife "I feel lonely even with you sitting next to me, we hardly talk with each other"

Husband " what do you mean I don't talk!! for God sake we live together and how is that possible we don't talk at all"

Wife " yes you talk only when you want to give me some work
"Where is my tie or socks?
The food is bland.
set the table.
Turn off the lights."
This is all you say."
and you never appreciate me for anything so I feel worthless in your eyes and it's always criticism that I hear from you about how I didn't do something properly or how am not a good mother or how lazy person I am when I'm not able to do your work."

Husband " what else do you want me to say? You already know everything about how stressful my job is"

Wife " I'm going through stress too by putting up with your parents, my whole inner-self  is being butchered mercilessly by your family and their sarcasm and do you think bringing up a family and managing the whole house is a child's play? Along with an unhelpful husband. If I oversleep for 15 mins in the morning it gets late for everyone in the house...... Ok why did you leave your previous job?

Husband " because 2 years into the job and I didn't get any appreciation or promotion"

Wife " it's the same with me. All my hardwork looks like a waste of time and energy for me, when I hear
only criticism and no appreciation"

Husband (angrily) " SO IS THAT WHY YOU WANT A DIVORCE??"

Wife " No, because I feel unloved, you are emotionally closed off from me"

Husband " This is how I am, men don't talk a lot"

Wife " does that include not telling me when your going to be late home? Or how much your earning? Or where are you going?"

Husband " I need some space all right? Why do you want to be know it all?"

Wife " it's just I'm worried for you when you come home late, but you think it's intrusion into your personal space. When I ask money for house expenses, you are always angry and complaining that you don't have enough money but you refuse to tell me how much your earning so that I can also make a household budget accordingly plus you also expect me to COOK lavishly."

Husband " Divorce is a big decision, think about kids and you can't take such a huge step just cause off I didn't give you personal information about myself, I am just worried that you'll dominant me more than you already do. There is something called as personal space."

Wife " sometimes we have to give a rein to our partners, it goes both the ways. You want full control on me (where I go, what I do where I spent?) and you refuse to do the same when it comes to yourself. Because of your insecurities you are emotionally pushing me away completely. You are building a wall against me and it's getting harder and harder by each passing day to break that wall. We both need some personal space but you are going extreme."

Husband (shouts) " You don't make sense at all, look at gibberish that your spouting. Fine you want a divorce then so be it. But it's not you whose pushing me away but it's ME whose going to divorce you and you are going to regret it".

Wife (angrily) " even now your doing the same like always. Why don't you ponder on your own shortcomings for heaven's sake. Remember it takes two to tango. You think am dominating you and I think your emotionally distant from me. But instead of sorting the matter out you just agreed for a divorce. You are so emotionally closed off that we wouldn't have had this conversation either if I wouldn't have brought the topic of a divorce"

Husband storms out of the house closing the door with a loud thud.
Wife sits on the sofa and cries.

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Divorces don't happen suddenly. There are signs that the couples ignore until the inevitable happens.

Domination:- don't dominate your spouse too much that he/she starts hiding things from you. Mostly men have insecurities regarding domination they don't want to be controlled and they feel giving small personal info about them is also like giving control in your wife's hand. Remember in marriage sometimes you have to give your rein to your partner and sometimes withhold it.
A little bit of domination to show love is cute it shows you care but going extreme is suffocating. It's the same for showing possessiveness. You have to be possessive about your spouse. It shows you are afraid of losing your love but at the same time it can become poisoness if you cross the line.

Communication:- Communication is like oxygen in a relationship or marriages die a terrible death. Women want to be reminded that you still love her. So don't be stingy with your words and affection and wife should appreciate your husband for their efforts and boast their ego.
Communication has to be two way. Imagine you are on a phone call and only one person keeps talking then after few seconds the person realises that there is dead silence on the other side and then disconnects the line.
So don't give that silent treatment to your spouse where the other starts to think if you still love her/him or not or perhaps that it's time to disconnect the ties of love.

Respect:- it can't be stressed enough on how important this is. Woman needs to hear that husband loves her every now and then only then she feels loved. But for a man it's respect. So don't belittle your husband or wife on their shortcomings or mistakes. Even if you correct them talk to your husband as if he is your boss and husbands should correct their wife's mistake as if she was the queen. That way wife's have less chances of getting fired and husband's death sentence by the queen of his house. :))

Obedience to husband:- Men want to be in control and not be controlled. So obey and listen to the things he says which offcourse are under your limit and husbands also must keep in mind  that demanding too much which you already know that your wife can't do it then don't ask or demand such things. 
Be kind and don't have unrealistic expectations from each other.

Control your tongue!.
Just because he/she is your spouse it doesn't mean you can just say what comes to your mind. Don't criticise and if you do want to point at mistakes think if that mistake is worth pointing out or your partner will eventually notice it, if yes then there is no reason for you to point out. If you think that this is how your spouse is who makes a certain mistake again and again then let it go. Remember no one is perfect and you should complete each other i.e fill eachothers shortcomings. Remember the famous line "opposite attracts" what am saying is husband and wife are two different personalities husband may be good in one thing and wife in another so complete each other by helping each other with less complaining and nagging. And even if you do have to say something negative then let be in a polite manner. Things that are said in harsh manner will only make your spouse to fight back even when they know that you are right.

DON'T BACK ANSWER. Men find this especially annoying for certainly most of the women have a sharp tongue. But I must also say that men are not lagging behind in this. Since they are afraid of control so they may usually fight back when they see even a slightest sign that he is being dominated and may, be extremely rude all the time to not let your partner take control over them.
So talk with each other respectfully.

Loyalty:- trust when lost can't be gained. Lower your gaze when you see the opposite sex and you get wrong thoughts. The best way to be loyal is when you see something or someone and are tempted towards the opposite sex then you should make love to your spouse that day. To remind yourself that you already have someone who you love and your bound together in a sacred bond of marriage. So do anything that you were tempted to do to the only one who you got into this sacred bond of marriage. This will help you to keep your thoughts straight and improper thoughts (lust) only towards the one who you are lawfully obliged too.

Family- some people(Indians) say when a girl gets married she just doesn't marry one person but the whole family. I say this is hogwash and a way to suppress and oppress the girl. Interference from in-laws and friends makes the couple always unhappy with each other because they want their spouse to be accepted by their family which is not going to happen even in million years and the unlimited complaints from them about your spouse will not cease. So just accept the fact that as long as you are happy with her/him don't let their comments or criticism get to you. The best way is to avoid listening anything negative about your spouse from family or friends. If you listen you may get influenced even if you don't agree with them at one point you may agree with them later.
When you love someone you love them with all the good and the bad but when someone points their mistakes out you may start noticing it which you had ignored before.
Trying to change your spouse according to the kind of daughter in law's/ son in law's your family wants is hedious. You are already in love with the person you are married too and you think he/she is not perfect because your parents or siblings have a problem with her/him then your marriage will have a thing or a two coming with fights and conspiracies.

Unwanted advice and interference. Learn to notice when the advice is needed and when the advice is uncalled for. For example David learns that Solomon's wife knows his friend's phone password and David says " what !? My wife doesn't know my password till this day and you told your password to her. Doesn't she know that you need personal space. If your wife knows all the details about you then you'll not hear the end of nagging from her so you better change your password".
See in this scenario David's wife might be extremely dominating or nagging and it's his way of keeping his wife at bay to avoid emotional drama. However it may not be the same with Solomon. They both might respect each others privacy and don't go beyond than what's needed. And now suddenly Solomon sees his wife checking his phone and thinks that his wife is spying on him and doesn't trust him. Whence he knew that there is nothing to hide and he also knows she uses his phone to pay the over due bills and nothing else. However the seed of discord has been sowed.
Being to cautious with your better half is hazardous and being to linient is like asking for trouble. So you have to always be in between and not go overboard with any matter.

Fights between husband and wife. This is an interesting drama that happens in every house, where a man and a woman live.
What you need to keep in mind is How you fight?.
1) Is the matter on which you are fighting is it worth the trouble.
2) Can you let go about the issue and have a bigger heart.
3) See and understand your mistake and apologize.
4) No foul language and screaming on top of your lungs.
5) Don't bring out the old issues. Let the dead matters be dead and let them sleep forever and don't pull them out of graves.
6) Dont go complaining about your spouse to anyone. You know your spouse better than anyone not your friends or family.
7) Don't let others interfere in your quarrels. It will only escalate the matter. A person doesn't want to be proved wrong in front of an audience hence, they are full chances either you or your spouse switching into a beserk mood.
8) Marriage conselling should be kept as a last resort.
9) Move away and take a brake. Think what went wrong and try to solve it. Both of them shouting and pointing fingers will not bring a solution. Re-address the issue in good manner after sometime.
10) Don't leave any loose ends or else they'll come back to haunt you. Don't leave any fights without addressing them properly. Your wife has an issue with you not giving a hand in upbringing of your kids. Then find a solution. Take sometime out only for your kids or if it's regarding schooling then get your kids to take tutions. Help each other if it's becoming a burden on the other and don't look down on your husband/wife for the help she/he is offering. Usually the work or help done husband/ wife may go unnoticed so appreciate the little things that you do for each other and don't take it for granted. This is one of the major issues when one partner is doing everything she/he could and the other is always complaining about how incompetent they are. Marriage is build on the sacrifices and efforts made by both of them.

For a happy married life there is a simple motto. Do all the above in proper ratio except for loyalty which has to be always full.
Anything that's very less is equal to none and anything that goes extreme then it becomes posion.
For instance less communication, respect, obedience etc will make Empty-shell marriages which have lost or never had the passion needed to make the marriage vital.
And having too much of domination, possessiveness, rudeness and even too much of love or caring where  your better half feels suffocated with it, will also poison your marriage. You can't say that just " because I love you I want to be with you 24 /7 or I care about you so I keep calling you every half an hour". Remember the most important point don't love your spouse too much where you cross the boundaries. Your 1st priority should only be one "PLEASING YOUR CREATOR YOUR LORD ALMIGHTY". Love him and HE'LL love you back many times more. Increase your spirituality and you'll see everything falling in its right place.